You Don't Have to be Alone
by Crooked-7-Glasses
Summary: It's nearing Christmas, and Nick needs to face his fears and be with someone he hasn't seen in twenty years. [Cover art by Kastraz]
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Special thanks to Kastraz for making the cover for this FanFic.**

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"Carrots. Carrots, _please_ help me."

"Sorry Nick, but I don't have it in me to help you."

"Carrots! I know you better than this!"

"Then I guess you don't know me."

"He's so fluffy!" Yelled one of the many rabbit kits that engulfed Nick, whom is on the floor in the Hopps residence. Nick frantically tried to free himself from the horde of bunnies by swinging his limbs all around, but to no avail; the bunnies' numbers and cuteness were too great.

Christmas was tomorrow, so Judy decided to go to her family for the Holidays and suggested that Nick came along to help put up decorations; however, he might have turned down the offer if he knew that the Hopps residence would be filled with rabbit kits.

"How sharp are your teeth?"

"Do you eat meat?"

"You are the biggest bunny I have ever seen."

"His tail is so soft!"

"He's not a bunny, stupid."

"Does it hurt if I jab you like this?"

"Mom! Trizney called me stupid!"

"SOOOOOFT!"

"Carrots! _Please!_ " Pleaded Nick as he clawed the air in her direction. Both Judy and her mother, Bonnie, couldn't help but chuckle at the adorable spectacle.

"Now kids," said Judy's father, Stu, "get off him. I still need him to put up some more decorations."

After a while of some of the older rabbits prying off kit after kit, Nick was finally free. He stretched his aching muscles, trying to lessen the pain. "Ugh. How many siblings do you have?" Asked Nick as he stretched his back.

"Well," Started Bonnie, "Stu and I have 552 children."

This surprise made Nick pop his back a lot harder than he intended. "…Wow. And you're able to support all of them just fine?"

"Well, not all of them live with us anymore." Started Bonnie.

"But we are a _hard_ working family." Insisted Stu.

"It's also nice to own a farm. Food and all."

"Yes, quite."

"But…" started Nick, "it doesn't… _bother_ you, or anything? I mean, it's a lot of kids to look after."

"Never bothered us in the slightest." Stu said with a large smile.

"I mean, it can't be easy, can it?" asked Nick.

"Well," started Stu, "at first we were scared."

"Oh, terrified."

"But eventually we got the hang of it."

"Mostly."

"Yeah, mostly. We still have the occasional heart attacks now and then."

"Especially with Judy and the whole cop thing."

"Yes. Especially that."

"But…" Nick was looking for the right words to say while avoiding eye contact with them and was scratching behind his head. "But… have you ever—I dunno… wished you had… less?"

Bonnie, Stu, and Judy were all shocked at what the fox had asked them. None of them could find the words to respond.

"Hey Nick, why don't we put up some more decorations." Judy suddenly said as she grabbed Nick by the arm and roughly pulled him to a nearby room with more boxes filled with decorations. Judy quickly grabbed a decoration out of one of the boxes and practically shoved it in Nick's face. "Hang these over the archway above us. You're tall enough to reach it on your own." Judy said awkwardly.

"Is… is it what I—"

"Just hang up the decorations." She quickly said, looking away from him. Nick was surprised that she was suddenly acting like that, but he reluctantly took the decoration from her and they started working. The two continued this in awkward silence for several minutes, but Nick couldn't take it anymore and he just had to break the silence.

"Is… is there something you want to talk about?"

Judy took a deep breath in and out. "I wanted to ask you something with just the two of us, and I didn't know how to start."

"Well, ask away. What's the worst that could happen?"

Judy looked away from Nick as she began to talk. "Its just… what you said back there about the children, and the ability to support them, and especially about asking if they wished that they had less children. Something is obviously bothering you. May I ask what it is?"

Nick looked at Judy and took a breathe in and a breathe out. "Okay." Nick sat down next to Judy. "I was a single child in a poor family consisting of a hard working dad and a part-time working mom. Together, they made just enough money for us to barely get by in life.

"When I was twelve, my father, John, went on a loaning escapade at the banks so we could have enough money to make a tailoring business, but each one he went to turned him down—most likely because he's a fox.

"We were running out of money, and fast. If it kept up, we would lose our house. One day, my father went out to try again, and he came back with a _lot_ of money. We were so relieved. He finally got enough money to not only pay off the bills, but to buy equipment and a building to set up business.

"All was well, but a week went by and we started getting a lot of phone calls by the same number and Dad didn't want us to pick up the phone. I didn't think much about it, but my mother was worried, and my father kept getting more and more paranoid about things.

"One day, when my father was not around, the caller called again, and I picked up the phone, asking them who they were. They told me that they were business partners and asked a few questions about where I and my father were. I, being an idiot, answered their questions.

"The next day, we got a phone call by that mysterious caller, and Dad picked up the phone. The message was brief, but whatever was said, it made my dad freak out. He told us that we had to leave the shop right then and there. But before we could get out the door, the room started to fill with gas and I got knocked out from it.

"I woke up in the hospital with my mother asleep in a chair next to my bed. Days went by until I got the whole story of what has happened. Turns out, my dad made a deal with a mob boss, and hadn't paid them back in full in time. So when the deadline came, my father wasn't able to give them back their money, and they… they killed him." Nick looked away from Judy, closed his eyes, and took a long, slow breath in and out. He slowly looked back at Judy. "They killed my father, Judy. Then they burned down the shop and left my poor mother to raise her only child all by herself. And it was _all_ because of me.

"My mother could never raise enough money to support the both of us and the house. So, being filled with guilt and believing it was the right thing to do, I ran away.

"And I bet you could fill in what happened for the next twenty years."

Judy had a tear running down her left cheek. "Nick. I… I didn't know. I'm… I'm so sorry." She said as she put her paw on Nick's arm.

Nick looked at Judy and quickly got back up. "Well, these decorations aren't going to hang themselves. Let's see what else we have in this here box." He said as he rummaged through the box of decorations. "Oh, lookie what I found." He said with a smile. "I found mistletoe." He held up the plant so to show Judy.

"Actually, Nick, that is holly. Mistletoe have white berries, while holly have red."

Nick looked at the plant, and sure enough, it had red berries. "Oh."

"Hey Nick!" called Stu from the other room. "It's getting kinda late. You should go home now!"

Nick looked back at Judy and handed her the holly. "Well, I should get going then. I don't want to miss the train."

"You're not staying?"

"Nah. Some rabbits here are giving me a terrified look, and I don't want to ruin Christmas for them." Nick turned and walked toward the direction of the front door. "See ya, Carrots." Said Nick giving Judy a gesture of good bye with two fingers.

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 **A/N: Yes, I did the math on how many children Bonnie and Stu would currently have. If they had 276 children when Judy was 9, that means they would have had 30 2/3 children a year. In the movie, Judy is 24, so that is fifteen years gone by. If the rate stayed stable, then in those 15 years they would have 460 children, but age also has a factor in this. Let's say both Bonnie and Stu were around 30 when Judy was 9, so let's say the rate has remain stable until they were 39 years old. (39 because the average rabbit can produce until they are 4 years old, or 39 rabbit years old.) So that would only be 9 years, which would bring us back to the answer of 276. So, 276 plus 276 equals 552.**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Sorry it took so long to upload this chapter, but I just** _ **had**_ **to get this chapter right.**

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Nick sat on the edge of Finnick's van with the doors wide open and was just gazing at the stars. Well, he _mostly_ did, because the van was parked in a narrow alleyway, so he mostly just saw sides and tops of buildings.

It wasn't cold - heck, because of the climate control, there wasn't even a single snowflake. The closest thing to snow in the Downtown district was frost, and even _that_ was slim.

"Ya want some?" asked Nick's deep voiced, fennec fox friend, Finnick, from inside the van as he held two glass bottles and extending one toward Nick.

"You know it's illegal to be drunk in public."

"Relax, _officer_ , it's root beer."

Nick took the bottle and Finnick sat next to him. "So, are ya finally gonna do it this time?" asked Finnick.

Nick opened his bottle. "I don't think so." Nick answered before taking a swig.

"Come on, man. It's been twenty years since ya even seen your mom. The least you can do is send a letteh."

"And say what exactly? 'Hey Mom. Sorry for running and not contacting you for twenty years because I became a con-artist and decided that I should never get attached to anyone, especially you. Oh, P.S. I'm also the reason Dad got murdered.'"

"Well, it's betteh progress than what ya done so far."

"Watch it. Remember who's paying you for staying out of trouble."

"Ya only give me twenty percent of what ya earn."

"Why are you complaining? $216.40 a week just for not doing anything illegal is a _sweet_ deal."

"Still borin', though." Finnick mumbled.

For a few seconds, the two were silent and continued drinking their drinks.

"So, how was Bunnyburrow?" asked Finnick.

"Eh." Nick shrugged. "It's cool, and all, but there were too many rabbits and I only remember two rabbits in full. Everyone else are just groups. Either young, old, energetic, dull, boy, girl, or just names like Cotton, Violet, Megan, Manny, Julie, Maude, Max, Jon, Fluffy, Penny, Eddie—there's a whole bunch of them.

"But I just felt… like I didn't belong, like a puzzle piece in the wrong box." Nick felt an all too familiar, but rare, feeling of extreme sadness in his chest. He hated this feeling, so he decided to change the subject. "But enough about me. What have you been up to?"

"There was a huge bug on my side mirror, so I shot it." Finnick took another drink.

"…Oh. Sounds… extreme."

"It was _huge_ , man. Oh, by the way, I need a new side mirror."

"Buy it yourself."

"I don't have any money."

"Wha… what do you mean you don't have any money? What did you spend it on?"

"I dunno. I woke up one day and it was all gone."

"Why didn't you call the police?"

"They would have arrested me."

"For what?"

"Drugs." Drink.

"…You're lucky I'm not turning you in right now."

"Speaking of 'turning in', do ya got a place to stay tonight?"

"Trying to change the subject? Fine. I'll follow. The answer is no, as usual. So, is it okay that I sleep in the van?"

"Sure. As long as this van's still mine, ya can always come back to crash anytime ya want."

"Thanks, Fin. That means a lot to me."

Hours went by until Finnick made sure that Nick was in deep sleep. He pulled out Nick's phone—which he pickpocketed earlier that day—and started texting. "hey Judy its me F. I got a idea."

* * *

Knock. Knock. Knock.

Nick woke up by the sound of knocking on the van's doors.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

Nick got up with a stretch and rubbed his eyes.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

"Coming! Coming already." Nick sleepily stumbled to the van's back doors. When he finally grasped one of the handles, he opened the door, letting in the outside light. Nick blinked his eyes, trying to clear his vision. He sleepily looked around to find whoever knocked, but he saw no one. He looked down and saw an all too familiar face. Nick gave a warm smile. "Well hello, Carrots. What are you doing in this very _fine_ alley-way this early in the morning?"

Judy smirked. "First of all, it's 11:00 in the morning—so it's not that early. Second, come on out so you can see that we are _not_ in an alley."

"What?!" Nick exclaimed. Nick hopped out of the van and sure enough, they were no longer in an alleyway, but on a long, old road with old houses along its side.

"Nick, before you begin, I should let you know that this was Finnick's plan."

Slam!

Nick looked back at the van and saw that the van's door has been closed. What shocked him more was the fact that it was driving off. "See ya, Nick!" called out a laughing Finnick.

"That's it. The next chance I have, I'm turning him in." Nick turned back around to face a Judy who was giving a very big smile. "Come on, Carrots, what's going on?"

"Well, Finnick texted me last night and told me to meet you here and to give moral support."

"Moral support for what?"

Nick," Judy said, her face becoming serious, "do you know where we are?"

Nick looked around, this time he was actually trying to fully see his surroundings. The first thing he noticed was that everything was covered in frost and what little snow there were was covering the overgrown grass and the tall, thick trees. This lead him to believe that they were no longer in Zootopia. It was an old neighborhood and Nick and Judy were standing on a long, narrow road. There were old houses lined up on each side, but the one they were right in front of was a one story, green, wooden house with old wooden steps leading up to the front porch and small windows on both sides of the front door.

Nick's eyes widened with recognition. Why here? Why now? Nick could only stare at what was his old house; and sure enough, inside waiting would be his mother.

He quickly turned toward Judy. He wanted to say so many things. He wanted to use his slyness that he picked up on the streets. He wanted to express what he has been holding back for twenty long years. But the only thing that he could say was, "Why?"

Judy looked at him and spoke like a mother giving loving council to her young. "Because for twenty years, you have forgotten who you were, and I want to help remind you."

"What do you mean? I know who I am. I don't need to see someone to know who I am."

"When you met my family, what did you feel toward them?"

"What does this have anything to do—"

" _What_ did you _feel_ toward them!" Judy shouted.

Nick was startled by this sudden outburst and took a small step back. He thought about the question while looking down to the side and rubbing the back of his head. "I felt like I was detached; like I didn't belong."

"Why?"

"Because… I guess it is because I felt like they felt that I was some stranger in their house. So I just… I just…"

"Pushed them away from your heart?" suggested Judy.

"Uh… cheesy way of putting it; but I guess so."

"Nick," Judy gently grabbed Nick's arm. "It's time you stopped pushing people away."

"I make plenty of friends. I made a dozen at work, and—"

"Do you truly know any of them? Do you know if they have a family, or what they like to eat in the morning, or even their favorite color? You don't truly know them, you just like talking to them."

"Isn't that what a friend is?"

"A friend isn't someone you're fond of. A friend is someone you care about. Nick, "Judy spoke with a softer tone, "It's time you let people into your heart once more; starting with your mother."

"B-but Judy—"

Judy put a paw on Nick's lip, silencing him. "It's time to realize that you don't have to be alone."

Nick looked once more at his former house. He stared at it, and stared at it, and stared at it. He couldn't move. The beginning of tears started to form in his eyes. He turned toward Judy. "I'm scared."

"Then let me help you." Judy extended her paw at Nick, palm facing upward. Nick hesitantly took her paw with his. She slowly led him to the house. Nick's heart was beating fast. _What am I supposed to say?_ Hi, how's it been/ Hello, Mother, I'm back/ Sorry for ditching? _What expression am I supposed to have on my face? Happy, sad, excited, guilty? How am I supposed to look my mother in the eyes?_

They walked up the front porch. _No! No! I still need to figure out what to do?_ They reached the front door. Judy let go of Nick's paw and stepped out of the way, making Nick the only one in front of the door. Nick was sweating like crazy. _What should be the first thing I do? Call out? Run away? What do I do? What do I do? WHAT DO I DO!?_

"Nick," Judy softly said. "Knock."

Nick's entire body was shaking with anxiety. But Judy was right: he had to at least knock. He lifted a shaking fist and _slowly_ brought it toward the door. Before Nick touched it, he stopped. _What would she say to me? Would she even want to talk to me? And if she does, would she be angry?_

Nick took a deep breath in, and slowly exhaled. He knocked on the door. Simply one, _single_ knock, and it suddenly flew open. Standing in front of Nick was an elderly, red fox woman who looks just like Nick, except her irises are ocean blue.

The woman looked to be in shock at what she was seeing. "Sorry for opening the door so ubruptly." She spoke her words slowly and soft. "I saw you coming up the stairs and I wanted to know if you would knock. I hope that was all right with you."

Nick could only nod. "I-It's okay. I don't mind at all."

The two just stood there, staring at each other for what seemed like forever. The woman finally broke the trans by slowly walking toward Nick until they were half an arm's reach away from each other. Hesitating a few times, she brought up her hands until they were barely brushing the sides of Nick's fur on his head before touching him. "N-Nicholas? Is it really you?"

Nick took a breath in. "Yeah. It's me, Mom."

Before Nick could say more, his mother threw here arms around him and hugged tightly, crying into his neck. "Oh, Nicky! I missed you so much!"

Nick hugged back. Nick could no longer hold back his tears. The tears fell onto his mother's dress like bullets. "I am so, _so_ sorry Mom. I thought it would be easier for you if—"

Mrs. Wilde pulled away from the hug, looking her son in his salted eyes. " _I. Don't. Care._ Nick. I don't care why you left. All I ever cared about for the past twenty years is seeing my son come home." She wiped away a stream of tears flowing down Nick's left cheek.

"I love you, Mom." Nick choked out while touching his mother's right hand. They pulled each other into another hug; one of pure love and understanding. They embraced each other for what seemed like ages. "Mom, I would really like to spend Christmas in our old house."

They pulled back from the hug so they can once again look at each other. "It won't be much," replied Mrs. Wilde, "I mean: an old house, a surprise visit with no time to prepare, I haven't even bought gifts for myself."

"But I simply don't care. I just want to be with you."

" _Welllll_ ," commented Judy. "It might not be so bad." Judy turned her full attention to Mrs. Wilde. "Hi, there. I'm Judy Hopps. I'm Nick's friend. oHHHHDo I have your permission to prepare the place up, Mrs. Wilde?"

"Uh… sure, sure. I don't see why not."

"Good. Now I need you two to move out of the doorway."

"Why?" asked Nick as he and his mother moved out of the way.

Judy pulled out a whistle from under her shirt and blew into it. Suddenly, about fifty rabbits came rushing into the house, all carrying something. Some big, some small.

"C-carrots. What is—"

"You'll see." Judy said, cutting Nick off.

Rabbits came in and out, busying themselves with bringing things in and putting more things in. In no time flat, Judy was pushing both Nick and Mrs. Wilde into the house. Mrs. Wilde gasped and put her paw over the front of her muzzle. The old, run down, poor house was filled with Christmas. Decorations, food, paintings, presents, and a real Christmas tree in the corner—well, a small one even for fox standards, but still a Christmas tree.

Judy walked in front of the two foxes, spread her arms out, and exclaimed, "Ta-da! Now _this_ part of the plan was mine."

"Oh, Miss Hopps." Choked out Mrs. Wilde. "Thank you so much. No one has done anything so kind to me in years."

"Don't mention it. Besides, my family did the physical stuff."

"Well Gid _did_ make a lot of pies, so it wasn't all us." Answered Stu from the kitchen.

"Speaking of which, we should eat some while they're nice and hot." Spoke Bonnie.

"Oh yeah. Tastes a whole lot better."

"Much."

Time went by. It went by with talking, laughing, arguing who should have the next slice of pie, exchanges of embarrassing stories of their children, Nick screaming for mercy to the little kits who were him. It was a wonderful time for everyone.

Judy was talking to her sister when Nick came up to her. "Hey Carrots, can I speak with you in private?"

"Uh, sure." She turned toward her sister and said, "Hey, can we continue this conversation later?"

"Sure thing, Judith."

Nick led Judy out onto the front porch so they could be alone.

"Well, Nick, what is this about?"

"Carrots," Nick spoke soft and slow, sounding like he was on the verge of tears. "I-I just really want to thank you for everything you've done."

"Don't give me all the credit. Finnick was the one who started it and my family—"

"No, Carrots. I mean, thank you for _everything_. Thank you for being there when I needed you. Thank you for trusting me enough to come back for me. Thank you for bringing me out of the dirt that I got myself into. Thank you for being a part of my life."

Judy was astonished, to say the least. "Nick. I don't know what to say, except: thank you for saying that."

Nick took this in with a warm smile, but soon he felt awkward and started to look everywhere but Judy. "Yeah. Y'know me. Sentimental guy, and all.

"…Hey, look Carrots," Nick said pointing up. "Your family put up some holly on the front porch."

"Uh, actually Nick, _that_ one is mistletoe. Heh. White berries and all."

Nick looked at the plant again, and sure enough, it had white berries. "Oh."

"Well, Nick, I feel awkward. Just because it's mistletoe doesn't mean anything. I mean, it's just a plant and al—"

Before Judy could continue, Nick planted a long kiss on her cheek. Judy gasped. She was shocked at the display of emotion. Her partner was kissing her on the cheek! Her eyes went wide; her jaw dropped; her ears went flat on her back; she blushed like crazy; her heart started to pound; her body felt hot. She couldn't move.

When he broke away, he looked her right in the eyes and said, "Judy, you really are cute." Nick stood up straight, went back to the front door, opened it, turned his head back toward Judy and said, "Well, Carrots, you want to come back inside?"

Judy had her paw on the spot where Nick had kissed her. She smiled and said, "Yeah." And she walked toward the door.

 _What does it mean to be alone? They say that it would be having no one around. But observing Nick, I know now that loneliness is when one's soul is filled with dread and gloom; so no matter how many people could be around, if one does not let them into their heart, then that person is alone. Once Nick let us into his heart, he was no longer alone. Now I know, without a doubt, that Nick will never be alone, again._

"Hey Nick!" Called Mrs. Wilde. "Have you seen any pretty girls, lately?"

"Mooooom!"

As Mrs. Wilde and Judy started a long and loud conversation about embarrassing stories of Nick, outside the snow slowly came down.

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 **A/N: I know it's late—screw you—Merry Christmas! :,)**


End file.
